Visiting C

Last week it got pretty cold down here in the "Ham." Friday night, I was out and about with my mother downtown and I have to tell you, I was F-R-E-E-Z-I-N-G. As we were headed back to our car and home. I couldn't help but look around for familiar faces and wonder where my friends were. I thought about my friend C and his "roommates" and wondered if they had enough blankets. And although I knew I wouldn't because it wouldn't be wise, I really wanted to go check on them. Instead, I prayed for them.

Saturday I woke up early because I had to go to work. Just as I was heading out of my neighborhood, I got a text from JM. I pulled over to read it (because I DO NOT text and drive). He was letting me know that C had made it into a half-way house. I have to admit, I cried a little. I was so happy to learn he was not only warm but he had a bed. It was wonderful news to get.

Today on my lunch break R and I went to visit him. He's at a great place. I'm so excited for him. He was very quiet at first. That's not like him at all. But before we left we prayed with him and he got the biggest grin on his face. It was truly one of the greatest blessing I have ever gotten in my life. He told us, "I'm alright!"

I asked him if he'd mind if I took his picture. He didn't. He even struck a pose.

Keep C in your prayers. They'll be helping him find a job and he needs a good fit. Also pray for him to make new friends since he is missing his other ones. And prayer for the men who the ministry hopes to get into that house with him.

Thank you my friends.

God is Good!

Super Christian or Not

Last week I told you that I had been worried about burning out. But that wasn't totally it. I felt like maybe I was a little bit of a fraud. That maybe I wasn't a good enough Christian to be going downtown. If the people downtown don't know Christ, then I would be representing something they didn't know and I am sooo far away from being a "super" Christian.

As I said, I don't take lightly that God has given me this opportunity each week. I think it is an honor and a gift from God because otherwise I just wouldn't even be able to show up each week. And, it is changing my life, my relationship with God and the people around me. God is definitely teaching me and loving me with this ministry.

These past couple of weeks, the ministry has made a few changes and again I feel lucky. While I am intimidated by the changes, I'm sort of wondering what I'm going to get to see God do because of them.

This past Sunday I got to talk to C about making changes in his life and finding a way off the street. Two hours before I saw C, I would have thought that I would never be able to have that sort of conversation. But when we started talking it just happened and it didn't scare me. I care about C, as does everyone involved with the ministry. I wasn't alone in talking to C. A couple of other folks were there too. I still have a lot to learn but what an honor God gave me to just get to stand next to him, pray and tell him he mattered. I don't feel so much like a fraud now because I feel like God used me and He knew what He was doing and He gave me what I needed to do it. He made it possible. It wasn't really me. I just got the honor of being there.

This past week's lesson is don't count yourself short in what God is using you to do. If God gives you something to do, then do it with confidence because of who God is. He knows what he is doing.

And I am still not a super Christian. This next week, God might use me to hand out napkins and I'm ok with that. Whatever He wants, I want to be there.

Please pray for C.

Like Jesus

"Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in your beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken." Rich Mullins

I didn't post earlier this week because I just really wasn't sure what to say. You know, I love being a part of this ministry. I mean I LOVE IT. But, you get to a point and it just becomes sort of, I don't know.... routine maybe. I'm not sure that is at all the right word.

But, the last couple of weeks, I've sort of had this fear that I would soon be loosing my enthusiasm... or maybe start to burn out. And even though I'm talking about the ministry, I think really I might just mean with everything. When I got involved with this ministry I actually felt a desire to cut out things that weren't good for my relationship with the Lord and I wanted to be around people who had a passion for Him... not just people who knew Him, but people who were seeking Him and serving Him.

The thing about this ministry for me is this, I actually do feel humbled to have the opportunity each week to see God's people out doing something. I would even say, I think God giving me this opportunity is one of the ways He is showing His love for me. Seriously, I feel loved by God because of this ministry that God would allow me to know the people running the ministry and meeting the fellas downtown is a big deal to me.

But here's the cool thing, Just when I thought I might begin to burn out... God puts a whole new spin on it. Last Sunday the leaders of the ministry sat everyone down and discussed some new ideas. I'm excited about it because I don't want to burn out, I want to continue and I want to be surrounded by God's people with a mission. I want to be more like Jesus. I want to care about the poor, the oppressed. I want to know God. God is good and I'm thankful he has given me this experience and the chance to be a part of his hands and feet.

I'll be out of town this weekend but I'll be back downtown next weekend.

Fall is in the Air

Sunday was another great day downtown. We had a group of 20 people go downtown with us and we had 29 hungry fellas waiting on us when we arrived. Going back to the parking lot has made a big difference. Lots of people have shown up the past two weeks.

The weather is getting colder and the men are starting to ask for things like blankets, hats, and coats. Last night I considered turning on the heat in my house, in the end I didn’t cave. I am clinging to the warm weather as long as I can. I’m in denial that I’ll have to change wardrobes soon, mainly because I don’t want to give up open-toed shoes and have to wear socks. But today, when I’ve been outside, I’ve been cold. I have on a blouse and a light knit wrap over it but I am still cold and of course, if I’m cold… I’m thinking of the fellas downtown and wondering if they are cold. Today a friend of mine asked me if we’d like some blankets. I’m so excited about getting those blankets because I know the people that can use them. By that I don’t just mean I know they can be used but I am putting faces to those blankets and I want the people I know to be warm.

I had jeans on this past Sunday when I was downtown, but I was still wearing sandals. R asked me if my feet were cold. They weren’t. We stood there and talked about how beautiful the day was and how the weather was cooling off. Talking to someone who is homeless puts a whole new spin on the weather cooling off. When I think of cold weather, I think of cuddly pjs, cozy sweaters, tall boots, warm blankets, hot chocolate, apple cider, and pumpkin pie. Those are the things I’d normally talk about with someone I was discussing the fall air with. But, I’m pretty sure my homeless friend had none of those thoughts. I tried to remember his situation as I talked to him. It’s just a whole different ball game for him. Spending time with people who have so little really opens your eyes to how much we have and how much we take for granted. I really need to just be grateful I have socks to put on and let my open-toe shoes go for the winter.

Rain or Shine

I said this last week but I’m saying it again. I know I can be pushy about the things that interest me. I took the Big Five personality test this summer and I discovered that I’m very neurotic. So, I guess I can’t help myself. BUT, I also found out that I am also very agreeable as well. So, I may have strong pushy opinions but I’m fine with you having different ones.

It’s weird because I really do have the homeless on my brain a lot. I’m telling you, sometimes I’ll be talking to someone or listening to something and I’ll think of the fellas downtown and I have to stop myself from mentioning them. I am trying not to be pushy but that’s just where my thoughts go a lot of the times.

I mention this because I have had people to tell me I need to back down and realize that not everyone feels as I do or wants to participate. So ok, I accept that. But, I still can’t help wanting to talk about what I see happening each week.

Anyway, since I am pushy and people do have other passions, when I signed my class up for providing a couple of the Sunday meals I just wasn’t sure what the outcome would be. Not that my Sunday School class has heartless people… it’s just, I’m pushy. And even though I am trying to be better, I can’t say that I am. No one likes to be pushed into anything. Folks in my class have their own interests. Some of them floor me by their dedication and their service activity. Some of the folks in the class have already given to the ministry. They’ve given clothes, bikes, food, money and perhaps other things I’m just not aware of. I’m no where as good of a person as some of my friends are. So, when the time came for planning the meal I wasn’t sure what the response would be. But then when I passed around an envelope for donations towards the meal and the sign-up sheet, I was very humbled by the response. People went beyond what I had even asked for, way beyond. I was so excited.

We moved back to our old location last Sunday. It’s just a parking lot as I mentioned to you last week. A lot of people came out there on Sundays last spring. I didn’t know what it’d be like when we returned. Would we have a lot of people our first Sunday back, or just the few that had been coming? I didn’t know.

I waited until about Wednesday to check the forecast for the Sunday meal. I was disappointed to see it was supposed to rain. I began to fret about the plan because we had decided to buy the men BBQ from Johnny Ray’s, which isn’t cheap. No one likes to be out in the rain, not even the homeless. If it was raining we wouldn’t have many people show up but if it wasn’t raining, we could have a big crowd. I knew no matter what happened, no food would be wasted; but, I still wanted people to come out for the meal. So even though, Birmingham was in need of rain, I started having people pray that it wouldn’t rain Sunday afternoon. God totally answered that prayer. It rained all Sunday morning but by the time we got downtown, it had stopped and it was perfect. No hot sun, no humidity, and no rain. God is good.

Seeing the effort put forth by my Sunday School friends for the meal was such a beautiful thing to me. I was so blessed by them. And, the men downtown loved the BBQ. By the end, we were scraping the pans to fill to-go plates. Not a scrap went uneaten. And so many new people showed up. It was just all in all a great day down there. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for everyone this Fall.

You know I never intended to actually get really involved with this ministry last Spring. I thought maybe I would just contribute something somehow every now and then but God is so funny because now I see it as the most amazing thing to be a part of. I think it’s totally changing me too. I’m so grateful God has given me this opportunity and all the wonderful people who are involved with it. They are the best. They inspire me and make me want to know more about my God and the love He has for His people.

In closing let me just put a plug in for Johnny Ray’s in Pelham on Hwy 31. We ordered the meal from them and they were good to us. So, go and have dinner with them one night.

Prayer Requests: Continue to pray for the ministry and the leaders of it. They are so dedicated to the men downtown they give a lot of their time to them every week. Pray for the new folks we met and will meet. Pray for wisdom, courage, and understanding for everyone who is down there. The goal of the ministry isn’t just to meet needs but to change lives. If people want off the street then the ministry wants to help them do that. Most of all, we want people to know there is a loving God, it’s not just a story.

As to the personal prayer requests I have made, God has been good. He is good.

You Are the Plan!

Yesterday was a long day. I say that because I fully plan to use it as the excuse for the doubts I mention later. If you’ve been keeping up with this blog or just me in general, you know that being involved with the homeless is something that has really impacted my life. I’m pretty passionate about it… and to some even a little pushy.

Last week I found out more about the Biscuit Ministry my church started a few years ago. I contacted a couple of folks about it and I was invited to join them this past Sunday. They meet at 6:45 AM. That’s AAAAAAAA. MMMMMMM. In my book that’s crazy early. I mean REALLY crazy early. I wanted to join them and I was enthusiastic about the opportunity but as Sunday approached I wasn’t sure I’d really be able to get out of bed. But, God took care of that because I woke up at 2 a.m. and couldn’t go back to sleep. So, I was the first person to arrive that morning at the church. I was there at 6:30. I’m glad God got me up because it turned out to be a great experience. It’s a little different from the other ministry I’m in but in some ways it’s the same. I guess really, it’s very much the same. They had 72 hot sausage biscuits to hand out and we drove around the city until they were gone. I was hoping we’d run into some of my friends down there. But, I didn’t see any of them. However, I did see one of the fellas I had met briefly once before. I mentioned him in an earlier post as the fella who could talk your ear off. It was nice to talk to him a little more. We ended our biscuit mission on the Southside of town where we all spent some time with the men that were there and when we left, we took 3 of them with us to church.

When we got back to church, I went and washed my hands and my face a little bit and then went back out to wait for the Worship Service to begin. I saw the three men from Southside sitting in the café area and so I went to talk to them and got to know them a little better.

I got home from church around 12:45. I ate a sandwich and laid down for a short nap. At 2:30 pm I was back at a different church ready to head downtown with the ministry I have been involved with these past few months. It was a super-hot day. I knew this because I was dripping with sweat. I could have used a nice breeze. It wasn’t until I got in the car and saw that the temperature read 100 degrees that I realized I had a very good reason to be sweating. Oh my gosh, it was hot. We fed 8 men under the overpass yesterday. I think perhaps more were fed with to-go plates as well but I’m not sure because I left the underpass to go directly to the airport to pick up my parents who were returning from vacation.

Where I began to have doubts seep in is from talking with a couple of the men. I really am a silly naïve girl. Yesterday, I think I just began to realize it. I really want to believe good things about people. Even so, I have always been pro boundaries but yesterday I saw a need for more boundaries with these men. I want them to know they matter to me but at the same time, I need a boundary. I need a boundary that will still let them know Jesus loves them but also with a healthy distance for myself. A couple of fellas yesterday asked me things that I don’t even discuss with close friends. To a normal person that wouldn’t be a big deal, but I’m not normal. I don’t mean I’m going to stop caring or going downtown or even that I will start avoiding people but I just need to figure it out because what I realized yesterday is that I don’t think the same way as some of these men do. I’m a feminist but I have to call it, I cannot be a friend to these men in the same way that another man can. We need more Godly men to step up for these men on the streets… actually the world needs Godly men and women to just step up in many situations.

On an encouraging note, the other thing I realized yesterday is how much I love being around the Godly people I have met through these ministries. Yesterday, I got to know a few more of them from going downtown with the biscuit ministry and it was great. There are high school and college age kids involved every week in these ministries. It’s inspiring to see them out loving people for the Lord. Being with other believers with a passion for serving the Lord is a blessing all on its own. It too, is changing me.

I heard Gary Haugen, who is one of my heros, say this week... God has given us the plan for the lost, for the hurting. We know what to do.
Micah 6:8 says

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.

You are the plan!

Prayer requests for the week. 1) that I figure out the boundary thing. And 2) that next Sunday is cooler. We are leaving the Overpass for another location. It’s where the group met in the Winter and Spring. We had more people show up there, but there is no shade and it’s a parking lot. It’s hot even if it’s not hot. I am such a wimp when it comes to heat. I really am. Seriously!


And as a P.S., If you go to my church you should check out the Biscuit Ministry… And if you want to check out the other ministry I write about, let me know. You should check it out too.

If a Thing is Worth Doing, It is Worth Doing Badly

I was back under the Overpass yesterday. I really missed not being there last week. It was good to get out of the car yesterday and see familiar faces waiting for us. And, I am happy to report, that I remembered many of the men’s names. So thanks if you prayed for me on that. Keep praying please.

I had the opportunity to speak with many of the men yesterday. Although, I always have that opportunity when I’m down there, yesterday felt a little different. I talked to them in a way that was almost like we had become friends. Like, we just didn’t talk about the weather or the bugs; but, I learned about their families and how they spend their days, and what they enjoy doing. Things that friends talk about. I don’t want to paint some sort of rose colored image of our relationship or what I experience when I’m down there. There are reasons people are on the street. Bad reasons. Don’t ever forget that. BUT, these men are still people. They are people that want to matter. They want security. They want to be warm. They want to be cool. They want a change of underwear. They want what everybody wants. And, God loves them and they need to know that.

Yesterday as I was talking to them, I was remembering my blog and how I talk about them. I felt a little guilty. These are real people in my city and I’m talking about them behind their backs or at least that is how I was feeling about it yesterday. If these men are going to trust me by telling me about themselves I don’t want to betray them in any sort of way. But, I want you to know about them because I want them to matter to you. I want you to know they are people, good people, people who struggle, real people who really should matter to us because they matter to Christ. I want them to matter to me too. I don’t want to forget about them when I’m inside, away from them and comfortable.

You know, the odds are against these men... Even the men who have been helped into a recovery program. It’s a tough world. People struggle, people stumble. We make mistakes. I found out that one of the men who had gone into recovery left the program last week. He stumbled. It breaks my heart. It was a brave thing he did just to go into the program. Pray for him. He knows he messed up. Pray that he will not feel that he failed but instead understand that he made a mistake. Pray that he will learn and grow from the mistake and try again.

Chesterton said, "if a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.” That doesn’t mean we have an excuse to put forth a poor effort. But these men are facing such a huge challenge that mistakes are going to happen but it is still a very worthy thing they are doing. Don’t over judge them. They may not get it perfect the first time.

We had another man ask about going into recovery yesterday. JM is going to be talking to him about that and see if he is serious and ready. Pray for both of them. Change is hard and scary. It’s a brave thing these men want to do.

Under the Overpass with Rain and Pudding

This past Sunday when we pulled up under the overpass there were about 5 men waiting on us. It was RC and my week to do the meal and we fixed Ham, potato salad, watermelon, baked beans, banana pudding, rolls and cokes. A mighty fine meal… if I do say so myself. Clearly, I was responsible for the less difficult items to prepare. And of course, you know I didn’t do the potato salad because that involves one of my great fears in life, Mayonnaise. But, you’d be proud of me. I helped serve the potato salad and even though I can’t be sure I didn’t have a crinkle in my nose while doing it, I did it.

Soon after we had gotten the food out to serve, it began to pour rain. One minute RC and I were standing at the car filling plates all nice and dry and the next minute we were standing in a river of water several inches deep. It was CRAZY! And the wind was blowing everything around… it was a little chaotic. I think the rain kept many people away. I don’t think we fed more than 10 folks this past Sunday. But, we were still able to give most of the food away via to go plates.

I was glad to see that C was there again. He was funny. After we had gotten everyone a plate I turned around and saw him talking to some of the girls from the ministry. He saw me and said jokingly, “don’t pretend you aren’t going to come over here and talk to me.” Of course, I was headed his way. When I got there, he hadn’t started eating yet. But as RC and I stood there, he tried the banana pudding and went crazy over it. He finished it up almost immediately and RC got him another serving. Before he left that day, we filled a whole to-go plate with banana pudding for him. I don’t think I’ll ever see banana pudding the same way again. We told him we missed him last week and asked how Q and T were doing. He said he hadn’t seen them since last week. That scared me a little because I had no idea why and I had introduced T to them. Though I don’t know all the details and it is difficult to understand what C is saying sometimes, what I gathered is that everyone who stayed in their abandoned building was arrested last weekend. I’m not sure if it was for trespassing or for some other darker reason. Whatever their problems are, I believe Q and C are good people. It makes me sad they were arrested. As I stood there listening to his story I wanted to hug him and tell him I loved him and how sorry I was about what happened. But I’m not sure that would have been the thing to do for various reasons. There is so much I don’t understand about life on the street. But, I know it does often involve bad choices and I don’t want to seem to be something I’m not going to be able to be for them. Listening to C on Sunday made me really realize how much some of these people mean to me. I want an ideal world, I want them to be better and I want them to live happily ever after. C is trying to give up smoking cigarettes pray for him on that. Also pray for him while his friend Q is away. Pray for them both and for T.

My prayer request this week is that I am able learn people’s names better. I know I have asked several of the men 3 or 4 times what their names are and I keep forgetting. It’s hard to make someone feel like they matter when you can’t even remember their name.

Keep praying for the folks going down each week ministering to these men. The ministry isn’t just going down there to meet needs, they want to help people who want the help, get off the street.

I won’t be going down to the overpass next Sunday because I’ll be out of town. But, I’ll be back the following week.

It is God

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast,because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal. Isaiah 26:3-4


So, in previous posts I've been telling you how abnormal it is for me to be out talking to people on the streets because I'm a quiet, awkward person. That is so true. I mean seriously, you put me in a crowd and I shut up. Even around friends, the bigger the crowd the quieter I am. And that's also true in talking to people I don't really know. Typically, I joke that you have to know me about 2 years before I'll actually really talk to you in any sort of normal way. That's not because I don't want to talk to you, it's because I'm weird and talking is just not normal with me. It's like my brain is literally blank... not a thought in there at all. It takes a good person to stick it out and befriend me. However, I don't hate being quiet, I mean, I regret the awkwardness; but, I honestly don't even always notice lulls in conversations around me sometimes.

I tell you the above just because I want you to know that my participation in the homeless ministry is a God thing. It is God. It is God. It is God. I wouldn't have the opportunity and I wouldn't be capable of participating if it wasn't. Yesterday, I was talking with a fella I had never met before. As I already told you, I was doing the needs list so I had a task to perform in talking with the man. But, as I was talking to him I was learning a little about him. I found out he was a 60 year old Vietnam Vet. What do you say to that? "Thanks for serving, sorry you are having to live on the streets now?" That doesn't seem sincere... I mean it might be true... but it seems sort of generic.... I mean the man served our country and now he's living on the street! Now there may be some other things going on with him that led to where he is now, but that doesn't mean it's not sad. And, I'll tell you, he told me that part of his story looking for an answer, an answer I don't have. I didn't have much to say but I did give him a hug and he seemed happy with that answer, for now. If you know me well, you also know I am not a huggy person. I'm not. If you get hugs from me, you are among few. But, I think that hug was an answer from God. He gave me that answer and I was grateful for it. Because whatever his story is, it seems he did deserve something.

Today the homeless helped me

After the worship service this morning, I was walking down a hall I don't normally walk down in order to get to my new Sunday School class location. This hall took me past boxes and boxes of donated items for the biscuit ministry. Now years ago, I had heard someone started a ministry for the homeless at my church but I didn't know it was still going on until recently and I certainly didn't know any details about it. I still don't. But, as I walked past all the boxes of things I started to think about the hands & feet who would be delivering it all and the people who would be receiving it. I couldn't help but say a little prayer for them. I am sort of looking forward to passing all those boxes each week from now on and getting to see how the items change. I will not take that walk for granted. Each week I will be blessed by it and I will pray for the people that I don't even know who are involved on both ends of that ministry.

All week I've been looking forward to seeing my friends downtown. When I tell you they are a blessing to me, well that doesn't really convey it all. There truly are no words to describe what it's like to just have the opportunity to show up and love somebody because of who God is. He is love. But today after lunch I was feeling a little down and a little hopeless myself and I just didn't know of what use I would be or could be. But as always, God was good to me. The minute I got out of the car under the overpass my woes started to disappear and I began to just see the men who had come for food, necessities, and company. Plus, JM asked me to do the needs list, that's simply just taking down any needs that people have so that we can try to help fill them. I was grateful to have a task to do to help keep the woes away. I immediately noticed Q, C and T were not there. Q and C always show up so I'm a little worried about them. I heard Q was in church today but I'm still a little worried. I hope C is alright and, of course, you know from last week I was already worried about T. Please keep them in you prayers.

All that said, Here is where my great blessing came from today, it was from talking to J, a fella I briefly mentioned a few posts ago, the guy who gave away his sandwich. J doesn't seem to be your average homeless fella. He's clearly very educated and loves the Lord. He is a definite example on how you can make a bad decision or face difficult circumstances, struggle with it and still love God. Right before we left today, RC and I were talking with him. He was talking about his faith and how hard it is to trust God sometimes. But he said, "God is mighty and He is all you need, you just have to remember that." J explained that sometimes you get knocked down and that's what you need. How you grow from such times, thats what makes you who you are and we have the Holy Spirit to help us. Today J told me what I needed to hear because I was ready to count God out on my problem. I'm still not sure what God is going to do. I've been praying about it for years and years but I shouldn't count God out. That'd be a bad move.